They had cuddled closely, him spooning her from behind, for what seemed like an hour. Now she was snoring ever so softly, and he gently released her and rolled away, extricating his arm from under her and relaxing with a sigh onto his side of the b- PONK!! In an instant, the landmine detonated, cleaving him in twey and flinging the largest remaining section of him hard into the wall on her side, just below the purportedly ironic Roger Moore poster.
It sucked that he had just been shot in the head, but it wasn’t killing him quite as immediately as he had expected, and he had time to relax his muscles down below and let out that big fart that had been coming anyway. And, just as the final blackness closed in on him, he thought he felt his whole colon discharging. Pppfffffrrrrtttttbbllblbbllbbblllbbb.